Lil' Karl and the river of lies

This may come across as provocative but that is not my intention.

I've been struggling since Hadley was born with how to present religion to her. I would, of course, like to instill in her some of the same values that we have as parents. We're spiritual but do not in any way believe any religious teachings. I feel that Hadley ought to approach everything in life with an open but critical mind, and this includes religion. But we certainly don't want to make the mistakes that many/most religious parents make, which is to force a belief system upon their child. Hadley can make up her own mind and we will cheer her on.

Here's the conundrum: we can't simply sit back while she's 3 and let her decide. First, she's way too young to make sense of religious propaganda and she's way too young to examine it with scientific rigour. Second, in North American society - as we all know - the overemphasis on Christianity shifts the balance of power of persuasion. Hadley will not stand a chance and likely faces the same existential/atheist crisis that I had at the age of 7. Icons, stories and churches abound. There is not the same amount of compelling "stuff" for non-believers, because we don't feel the need to convince ourselves or others. (This, of course, replicates the age-old right wing vs. left wing information battle).

So what do we do while she's 3 years old? Here's an example, if I'm being too rhetorical at this point. So we're walking through the mall to the grocery store and Hadley sees two huge images hanging on the wall: Santa and Jesus. They are side by side and form a part of some Christmas display. Hadley naturally asks who they are. My answer to "who is Santa?" I will deal with in my next blog post. But as for Jesus, up to now I have been referring to him as Lil' Karl. I just don't want to get into it with her before she can really understand the history of Christianity and the history of resistance to religious oppression. It's not my place to bombard her with my beliefs but nor is it responsible to give her the Christian interpretation so early on in her vulnerable life.

So I just call him Lil' Karl and she shrugs, and walks on. If I had said, "that's Jesus", the name may have stuck with her. Since 'Jesus' comes up in conversation more often than 'Lil' Karl', she is likely assimilate what she hears about Jesus more easily. She will begin to ask more questions and hear more stories about divinity and resurrection and stuff like that. Which is fine, if she's ready to process these stories as stories and not truth. I don't think she's ready. And it's very hard/painful to un-believe once you have been brainwashed.

Believe me, I WANT Hadley to ask questions and I want to tell her the truth. I feel terrible about telling her a lie by calling that long-haired white man Lil' Karl. But he's certainly not Jesus either. Jesus the Jew. Jesus the scruffy desert-dweller. Jesus who would have died at 32 anyway because that was the life expectancy 2000 years ago. No, that's not Jesus but it's some false image that gets forced onto young children everywhere. I simply cannot explain the concept of lies and propaganda to a 3-year old. So I am forced to choose a lie to tell her. Either I replicate the Jesus lie, or I invent a new one. I could say, "I don't know" but then she'll just ask someone else. So for now, that guy is Lil' Karl. It was meant as a joke but you can tell my reasons are serious indeed.

Long live Lil' Karl!